Where are we now
* The following post is a work of fiction. All names, places, and events mentioned which have any relation to real-life people and events are purely coincidental.A friend of mine, Harry, was discussing with me a conversation he had with his colleague in NY during the weekend. Harry, who was raised in manila, has been in the IT business as a developer for about 4 yrs. It's a bit nerve-striking for him to have this conversation with his buddy that he had to tell his friends in manila.
His buddy in NY had been telling him about his dream about working in game company. Well most of the people in his circle of friends, who were also born in manila, were having something like that for a dream. There wasn't anything wrong at all with the conversation at all, but somehow it made Harry feel sad because he couldn't have anything to say that could match the things that Harry's pal in NY was saying.
I told him that well, his friend does not understand that not everyone is blessed with the opportunity to be sent to a foreign country to work so that he/she could get exposure, and possibly recruited for good work on a project. Couple that with the backward knowledge of IT skill here in manila, it's an uphill battle.. Imagine, competing with hundreds of foreign people for work in a pretigious gaming company in the US is like going to a casino with 200 dollars when everyone walks in there with thousands. It's not a very funny joke, I said.
When he finished ranting, I asked him, so what are you going to do now after having that conversation with your buddy? It's not like you're competing with him or anything.
Harry said that he wasn't competing, that wasn't the plan at all.. he was just plain sad. His main idea was that he regret being born in manila and not having all those opportunities.
"So it's envy then?" I asked. "No" was his reply.
It's just that having the means to achieve your dream and having the opportunity to do so should be present at the right time (usually at the same time) in order to for a skill to become of any use at all.
He was right. I've been a designer in the better half of my IT career but have always been a programmer deep inside so I know exactly how he feels.
Having heard enough of this, I told him that he's experiencing undue unhapiness because he's striving to reach something he can't reach just yet. No, I didn't tell Harry to give up on his dreams of being this and that. I just told him that you have to set your goals in sizeable, feasible and achievable targets. That way, his dream won't look so daunting. Not a word was said after this. Looks like our conversation was over.
-------------- 5 mins later ----------------
After I closed the mailbox, I was wondering if giving false hope to your friends was good. More importantly, if it IS the humane thing to do at all.. I know somewhere and somehow, he'll get to fly somewhere, like his buddy, not to NY but to any other place where he can have his opportunity and chance to work in this company he's always been talking about. He's aging. Almost 30.. I know that's still somewhat young but still.. I don't know.. there's something so wrong about it -- it's like, at his age, the world is already expecting him to get married and settle. All his dreams that he's been talking about will go down the drain.
I had dreams like those too.. once. So I know. But there's a big difference between idealism and matyrdom. When I think of him making 25 a month thousand so that he could buy a house amounting to 4 million (for example), minus living expenses, not in 10 years of working will he ever reach that dream.
Personally, I am willing to die for my dreams. But I'm not that of an idiot.
Wiseguys and good guys vol. 1
One of the ultimate feats of guy's self-control is this. With a beautiful woman in front you, try working.Wait let's make it more challenging. Make sure she's somewhat facing you as well.. something like.. your viewing angle is perpendicular to each other.There, can you visualize it? Good.Then try working without breaking a stride. Not without a single smile, don't even try to steal a glance. ( somewhere 30 minutes down the line, she's going to think something "wow, he isn't noticing me or anything, am i unattractive?" or something like "wow, he's really trying hard not to stare. such a gentleman *sic*" )Usually, it's the latter. But only the wise guys know the best way to relating with a girl easier is to put her in a position that she's at her best most noticeable self and she's still not getting your attention. Yeah that can be damn frustrating for the girl. You on the other hand, get your work done and keep working your ass off and you feel good at the end of the day for being productive.Can you still visualize that? If your answer is yes, then yeah keep that up and you'll:a) End up single for life (LMAO)b) End up with most girls respecting you for being a gentleman *sic*( I really hate "b", but I can't think of a "c" right now )actually, there is a "c" but it's too classified to even mention.but take it from me, you guys should try it sometimes. The main feat of practicing self-control is really fulfilling. ^_o
The perfect day
Feb 14 was the perfect day.I beat up 15 people in the Tekken machine (actually, 15 matches) in one day. It's not something I usually do, but it felt really good seeing all that training coming to fruition.Secondly, g4's number 1 marduk player is back in the Tekken circuit (must've been single again). Yeap I know, the moment he got himself a girl, not a trace of him was ever found in glorietta. And it was like this for almost 4 months! Man, he must've been itching for a good match. So we had an epic battle. Amidst all the people watching, there's no better sight than to watch 2 pro's have at each other in a deathmatch.Thirdly, our Philippine champion paid g4 a visit. Just watching him play is inspiring. Normal people wouldn't know it, but he emits an aura of mastery plenty of players all over manila have yet to achieve.More importantly, I'm really glad that all that shittalk about playing for money by two players in rival teams has simmered down. I don't see the point. They'll just end up in even worse terms. Just keep on practicing, then that's that.What the fuck were you all thinking? That I was on a date with my girl? I wouldn't take her out on Valentines day, nor would I give her flowers. It's just so plastic and it loses its meaning entirely.If ya wanna give yer gal love, give her flowers randomly, not during some occasion where its expected.SCREW valentines day. Next to Christmas, it's the next pathetically plastic commercial occasion.Inspired by the Saint and I quote:" Funny how we spend to "pretend" that love is really everywhere. Same with Christmas. "Yeah das why I love this girl, she doesn't insist on the *bullshit.* The word bullshit is synonymous to "icing". ^_o
Fate's practical joke
The amusing thing about the events in life is that sometimes, things happen that are far too great to be coincidence.Let's flashback a year ago at this same month. A gal pal was ranting to me-- she was supposedly on her way to France to be a flight stewardess but as bad luck would have it, diplomacy shit happened and to cut the long story short, she is still Manila now. She is working again but somehow she feels down because she really wanted that to be her big break. Now the thing that makes this whole story suck even more is that, well.. she was the only one left. All of her other friends who applied for work in France actually got to go there. Can u see what a sickass fate could be sometimes?Back to manila, present day (3 am something)I emailed her this early morning. I was up at around 3 am. I couldn't sleep coz I had this dream. Anyway, the week before a different friend was complaining about life - another "opportunity problem". She on the other hand, didn't know what opportunity to get - she had a choice of migrating to Australia, or working in Canada, or working in London as a hotel concierge. WHAT THE FUCK is wrong with Fate!!? I just told her off and said "Well, that's yer fortune, better take advantage of it, lest it be taken away from you". I told her just that then I stoppped furthering the conversation. It would only make me feel worse for my friend (the first one I mentioned). There are so many blessed people who waste things while there are other kind DESERVING people who are left with false hope, and mind you - they are doing SOMETHING about their situation in life. They are not idling by, but it's just that fate didn't have it in for them for that I wanna screw fate one day..Not that I'm really mean, but karma will probably take its toll on missed opportunities sooner or later. I just pray sometimes that the hands of time would run a bit slower.
It's wearing off
On my way to work I take the train.During rush hour, the train is usually full. But this day was different. The platforms were packed more than usual. Having assessed that it would take more than what would be worth my waiting time, I decided to take a round trip by riding the opposite way, then just get on the start of the line in my right way to work. So I did just that.I was sleepy and still a bit tired so I held on the metal railing supporting the train seat. I was like a koala, yeah that's a better way to put it. Soon before the train left, the seats were full. So I was like "yeah I got mahself a seat bwahahaha".And so after two stations, I was on the station I was previously waiting on. Then this lady in her mid 20s hopped aboard. She wasn't exceptionally pretty. She was on her way to work as well. My mind was racingly debating "should I give her my seat?". My muscles were screaming, "Hey gimme a break yo dumbass!", while my mind was saying "Well, we're all paying anway, so it's fine if ya didn't".So it was basically a mentally no-win situation right? (as to I should give my seat)But then it happened. Nonchalantly I involuntary stood up (like someone used the force at that time I swear), and motioned the girl to take my seat. She smiled then sat.When I finally exited the caboose, I don't know why I didn't feel that good about letting the girl have my seat. It was probably because I was really tired, and that resting up mattered more. I dunno, maybe the next time I see a lass board and I'm sitting, I won't bother with this shit anymo.Better yet, I'd rather just stand...
